ProgressOhio

TO: Upper Arlington Public Library Director Ann Moore

FR: Operation Save America, Betty-Jo Bigot, Corresponding Secretary

Dear Ms. Moore,

We are delighted that the holy lawyers of the Alliance Defense Fund and Citizens for Community Values have opened your cold heart to Jesus. Finally, we have gained the legal right to praise Our Lord in your public library meeting room. With God, All Things Are Possible!

While we realize that there are 19 Christian churches in your small community -- many of which could easily accommodate us -- we intend to teach you a lesson about "viewpoint discrimination," God willing.

That said, we're sure your community will be accommodating to the many out-of-towners we are expecting at our "meeting."

We plan to discuss how we as True Christians(c) can put prayer back in public schools and institute "Christian Swim Time" at your public pools.

Your Jewish and Muslim community members are welcome to attend our "Who Killed Jesus?" seminar.

For the young folks, we've hired a Christian rock band and adapted our "On Fire for Jesus" youth program to an indoor venue. I'm sure you'll make an exception to the library quiet rules for us -- some of us can't control our love of Jesus!

What a glorious time we had in downtown Columbus in 2004! God-fearing folks from all over the country sang and prayed for the redemption of your evil city. It is a miracle that no one was arrested for littering, erecting giant bloody fetus pictures on City Hall property, or for burning a Koran!

According to our 'Libraries That Hate Jesus' database, your facility is located next to a park. Praise God! How wonderful that our overnight "meeting" participants and their families can set up tents on God's Good Earth, and not have to sleep in their cars as they did in 2004. Praise Jesus for the nice bathroom facilities!

With God's help and your public library, we will be silenced no more!

Praying for your heretic soul,

Betty-Jo Bigot (Mrs. Pastor-Coach Billy-Bob Bigot)

P.S. We will require a film projector for our special screening of Mel Gibson's new Christian movie, Terri Schiavo: What Brain-Dead Women Want.